thoughtfulness

Good News and Neurons

August 28, 2016 by kalani

Mindfulness Kalani EVOLVE podcast

News is what people tell us about what we haven’t experienced. We can improve our life experience, and even our situation, when we consume news in ways that are responsible, nurturing, and beneficial to ourselves and to others.

One of the challenges we face when posed with the question, “What should I believe about what people tell me?” is the fact that we are biologically predisposed to believe what people tell us. As we evolved as humans, we developed the tendency to believe stories about potential dangers over things that were potentially neutral.

Imagine a group of early humans walking through the forest together. All the members are spread out far enough so they can see and hear one another, but not close enough to see and hear the same things. Some of the members hear a sound come from the bushes and quickly need to decide if it could be an animal or not. If it is an animal, is it one they are looking for or one that might be looking for them? Have they found prey or are they about to become prey?

A member of the group closest to the sound decides it’s not worth the risk and starts to run. The others in the group see him running, assuming there is danger, and begin to flee towards safety. They regroup on a nearby hill, ready to defend themselves if needed. Suddenly, a large bird emerges from the bush and flies away. Dinner has eluded them, but everyone is safe.

Our need for safety is often greater than our need to confirm what is actually happening in our environment. We are more likely to believe in potential threats, simply because it’s far more acceptable to lose a meal as opposed to losing one’s life. We are wired for defense and that makes us especially susceptible to what people tell us about what we haven’t experienced. Not believing in potential threats can place us in stressful situations. At the same time, believing in unconfirmed threats can make us fearful, paranoid, and disempowered.

It’s up to each of us to question the news we hear, to seek to confirm what others tell us about what we have not experienced, and to decide for ourselves how to respond, rather than running in fear because we see other people running in fear. Yes, maybe there is a tiger in the bushes waiting to pounce. It’s probably a good idea to remain a safe distance away until that theory can be proved or disapproved.

When we choose to run away from any situation in which we have no first hand experience, not only do we increase our own anxiety due to all the terrible things we imagine, we lose the opportunity to experience the world as it is, to grow and develop, and to nurture and empower ourselves.

When someone tells you story of a terrible danger, rather than running away in fear, thank them for letting you know about a potential danger, then do your best to discover the truth so you can take action based on your authentic experience.

When we breathe, we consume. When we drink, we consume. When we eat, we consume. When we see and here, we consume. Whatever we consume, we add to ourselves in some way, shape, or form. We consume to nurture our bodies and our minds. The quality of what we consume directly affects the quality of our life experience. We are shaped by our environment and our relationship with it.

We are social creatures, sharing a high degree of empathy. It’s quite easy for most of us to imagine the sensations and feelings of other people. When we are exposed to people who are laughing and smiling, we often laugh and smile, even when our experience is brought to us through something as remote as a television or computer screen.

Because our minds are equipped with mirror neurons, it’s fairly easy for most of us to experience reflections of what happens to others within ourselves. If you’ve ever cringed when watching someone else getting physically hurt, you’ve experienced this phenomenon. The question we must ask ourselves is, “Am I making conscious choices about the types of experiences and information I am consuming?” Are you aware of the quality of what you consume?

Other questions might include, “What is the feeling or emotional quality of the experiences I am consuming?” and, “What is the likely impact on my own mood or emotional state as result of watching this content?” and of course, “Is the emotional quality of this content in alignment with my personal needs and goals, in terms of how I want to feel?” Answering these questions will help you improve the quality of whatever it is that you consume.

Not all food feeds your body in ways that are beneficial. All food will shape your body, but not all food will benefit your body. All the stories, news, and information you consume will shape your mind, emotions, and spirit, but only some will be beneficial. Many of us live in environments that have been described as a “food swamps,” areas where there is an over abundance of all types of foods, those of quality and those of little or no quality. The challenge it is not having food to consume, but in finding and consuming the quality food that will lead to a quality life.

Today, many of us experience a news and information swamp environment on a daily basis. The challenge is not to find stories, but rather finding those few stories that have the potential to lead us down paths of discovery towards truly beneficial and authentic experiences.

Is it possible to become mindful of the information you consume? Is it possible to recognize, early on, that a show you’re watching contains content that has nothing to do with your intellectual and emotional goals? Is it possible to reduce the amount of time you spend listening to stories that have little or nothing to do with your day-to-day life and which may be fanning the flames of fear in your heart?

If you don’t take an active role in making choices about the stories and sights you consume, you will be at the mercy of those who may be unaware of the potential damage they are causing in the hearts and minds of their brothers and sisters. This is not about sticking your head in the sand or ignoring information. It’s about taking an active role in what and how you consume what is available to you, seeking first to gather the information that supports your needs and goals, and always investigating every story you hear, so you don’t end up running away from life in fear, but walking towards the unknown, curious, and excited to live more deeply.

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Cover Art by Cameron Grey

A Natural Practice

June 26, 2016 by kalani

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Hold what is but do not hold it to be anything.
Work with all that comes from Heaven, but do not seek to hold it.
Just be empty.

The perfect man’s heart is like a mirror.
It does not search after things.
It does not look for things.
It does not seek knowledge, just responds.
As a result, he can handle everything and is not harmed by anything.

- The Book of Chuang Tzu

They tell us to clear our minds, to empty the space in our heads, to focus on non-thinking. What tool will you use to reach this state, your mind? Will you think your way out of thinking? Will you clear your thoughts with different thoughts? How will you suppress the parade of images that seem to flow freely? Even if you could press a button and reduced the chatter in your mind, how would you guarantee that only the most useful thoughts remain?

If your mind is busy, active, and creative, isn’t this obviously its natural state? If you take the position that your mind is over active, that is should be less active, aren’t you also implying that there is something fundamentally wrong with the way you are? If your position is that you have a fundamental flaw, you will likely spend a vast amount of time and energy trying to change your very nature. This type of approach to creating inner peace and a quality life experience is sure to pose constant challenges, and in many ways, puts you at odds with nature.

How can you expect to create mental harmony when you refuse to accept your fundamental nature? The human design is the product of millions of years of evolution. Is it realistic to take the position that it’s somehow not what it is supposed to be–that we should all be different than we are? Even when taking the view that we are designed intelligently, is seeking a workaround to this design respectful or appropriate?

If your goal is greater mental clarity, harmony, and contentment, then you first need to gain a realistic view of the conditions, challenges, and resources you have to work with.

There’s a better way to create harmony within yourself and between yourself and others–a way that accepts your nature and embraces your ability to move beyond confusion into clarity, harmony, and contentment.

First: Accept the nature of your mind. Rise above the need to view your design as flawed. You are not flawed–you are human. You have a special type of mind that requires an insightful approach to creating inner peace and harmony. Accept your mind as creative, imaginative, busy, and prolific. Celebrate these qualities. Enjoy the richness of your imagination.

Second: Become an observer of your mind. Become curious. Watch your mind like you would the weather. Everything you observe is natural. Accept every thought and feeling as they move through your awareness like the weather moves across the land. Resist the temptation to think of it as anything but natural. Resist the temptation to label thoughts and feelings as good or bad. Resist the temptation to suppress or clear your thoughts. Simply watch the parade with a sense of wonderment.

Third: Choose and use the thoughts that serve your values, leaving the rest behind. Know that most of your thoughts are nothing more than repetitive displays of your imagination, creative possibilities, and improbable scenarios. Be amused, but not annoyed. Be surprised, but not afraid. Be intrigued, but not irritated. Be curious, but not confused. Your mind is trying to help you by showing you possibilities, giving you choices, offering you options. Let it make these offerings, then choose the thoughts you want to use to help you reach your goals. Not all thoughts are created equal with regard to usefulness. This topic will be discussed in greater detail in a future episode.

This is your thoughtfulness practice.

There is nothing wrong with your design you only need to become more skilled in using your mind, just the way it is.

Accept the nature of your busy mind.
Observe your thoughts without judgment.
Choose to follow those thoughts that serve your values.

Take this practice with you anywhere and cultivate it anytime. Use it to create more harmonious relationships, both inside yourself and between yourself and others.

When we choose this approach for ourselves and cultivate our practice, our relationships and communities will reflect the changes. All positive change begins with you. It’s easier than you think.

Thank you for joining me on this journey, and know that–You Are Loved.

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Music by Layne Redmond, Greg Ellis, and Azam Ali. Cover art by Cameron Grey.

See the Credits Page to find out more about our partners.

The Sacred

April 15, 2016 by kalani

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mindfulness, spirituality, kalanii das, evolve, health — Artwork by Cameron Grey

Not until a person dissolves can he or she know what union is. There is a descent into emptiness. A lie will not change to truth with just talking about it. - Rumi

Some people will tell you that there are places on this earth that are more sacred than others. These words may lead us to believe that there are also some people who are more special or sacred than others. These beliefs often lead to valuations based in personal preferences, experiences, and which can lead to feelings of low self-worth. “This place is not special.” “I am not special.” “I need to be more like the special people.”

The truth is, if the universe is indeed a sacred body, then every aspect and expression contained within it is also sacred. The spirit of creation does not play favorites and equally supports the whale as it does the minnow.

It’s true that some places on the earth are more highly valued by people, likely for their natural beauty, unusual features, or historical uses, but these values are all placed upon lands by people. While there’s nothing wrong with making a pilgrimage to a place that one believes holds some key to spiritual enlightenment, it’s also true that enlightenment can come at anytime, and in any place, on earth. What can be achieved in one place, can be achieved in all places.

Don’t let yourself fall into the trap of believing that you need to travel from home in order to fulfill your spiritual destiny. Each of us can make tremendous progress where we are right now. Your entire life is contained with in the present moment. There is no other time. Anything that you can do, you can do now.

Where does one place end and another begin? Naming a place does not separate it from the continuum that is the earth. You are not contained within your city, state or country.

You are not bound by the borders of man.

You do not exist on the earth.

You are the earth.

Everything in the universe is the universe.

You are also the universe – and the power of the universe runs through you.

Look back throughout the history of mankind and you will clearly see that anyone, from any place, and of any economic or social status, is capable of great wisdom, spiritual grounding, grace, and love. Don’t, for a second, believe that you have a deficit when it comes to achieving a deeply fulfilling life.

Some may tell you that you need to travel to an exotic location or that you must wear certain types of clothing, sing or chant certain songs, make specific utterances, and position your body in specific ways, all so that you may ascend the spiritual ladder.

Participating in ritual often helps us feel more grounded, like we belong to something greater than ourselves. We search endlessly for answers, keys, and hidden secrets to enlightenment. When will we realize that everything we need, every bit of information, is available to us in this moment-in this place. It is when we stop the fervent search for something outside of ourselves that we come to a place of true contentment.

You may be an elderly person or a child. You may be rich or poor. You may feel strong or weak. No matter what labels you or others placed upon you, no matter what circumstances surround you, and no matter what you believe about the world, know that where you are you are right now is as sacred a place as atop the highest mountain. Know that the keys to your spiritual life are held in no one’s hands but your own. Contentment is not granted to us by others. It is your birthright.

Let a child be your teacher. Experience the joys of life by observing nature. Trust and follow your intuition. Most people are too distracted with their own suffering to be your guide. If someone tries to convince you that this life is some form of torture, wish them well, then prove them otherwise.

Anger

April 7, 2016 by kalani

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We don’t actually become angry from a state of non-anger. We allow circumstances to show how angry we are. Since none of us will ever be able to control what happens in our lives, or how other people will behave, the only way we can be certain to feel less anger in our lives is to have less anger in our hearts.

“At the moment you become angry, you tend to believe that another person has created your misery. You blame him or her for all your suffering. But by looking deeply, you may realize that the seed of anger in you is the main cause of your suffering. Many other people, confronted with the same situation, would not get angry like you. They hear the same words, they see the same situation, and yet they are able to stay calm and not be carried away. Why do you get angry so easily? You may get angry very easily because your seed of anger is too strong. And because you have not practiced the methods for taking good care of your anger, the seed of anger has been watered too often in the past.

All of us have a seed of anger in the depth of our consciousness. But in some of us that seed of anger is bigger than our other seeds– Like love or compassion. The seed of anger may be bigger because we have not practiced in the past. When we begin to cultivate the energy of mindfulness, a First insight we have is that the main cause of our suffering, of our misery, is not the other person – it is the seed of anger in us. Then we will stop blaming the other person for causing all our suffering. We realize she or he is only a secondary cause.”

– THICK NHAT HANH, from the book, ANGER - Wisdom for cooling the flames

Too often, when words or actions spark and up swelling of anger, we are quick to look outside of ourselves for the cause. We may blame a life situation, such as a flat tire, an injury caused by an accident, or an unmet expectation for our own performance, such as not earning as much as we had hoped or not having a certain number of friends. But more often than not, we turn our attention towards those around us and lay the blame for our anger on others, even those we hold close.

Without realizing it, we jump to the conclusion that other people, often through very ordinary acts, can control our emotions, as if we were puppets dangling from strings attached to their evil fingers.

What most people fail to recognize, is that their anger rests inside, like a reservoir waiting to be tapped. Those who have a great deal of anger will find that it is expressed more easily and more often then those who have cared for and released their anger through conscious practice.

The more anger you have, the more anger you show.

How can someone who shows up late cause another person to become angry? Anger in this case is the product of an unmet expectation, “They should be here by now.” and egocentric judgment. “They don’t respect me enough to show up on-time.” You don’t get angry because someone is not where you are; you simply use that situation as a reason to express the anger you already have. The situation is the trigger that fires the gun. But what if the gun could be emptied?

Trying to reduce your anger by managing what happens in your life is an attempt to control the uncontrollable. Turning yourself into a victim by blaming other people, or life circumstances, for your anger, will likely only add to the reservoir of pain you keep on hand.

The first step in reducing the amount of anger you feel when things don’t go the way you want them to, is to admit that you have anger–and that it is yours to care for.

One way to get to know your own anger is to observe your self talk and listen to the types of stories that you tell yourself–and other people. Listen to your complaints and grievances then trace your words back to the feelings. These feelings are yours and no one else’s. Find the feeling. Let it express. Let it be OK.

Get to know your own anger. Then, do not try to push it away, shove it down, or stomp it out like a fire. Instead, hold it close to your heart and do your best to listen to what it has to say. Treat it like you would an injured friend, with compassion and love. You may find that this practice will diminish the feelings of anger you carry with you.

Over time, when you are experiencing an undesirable situation or an unmet expectation, whether it involves another person or not, you may find that you do not become as angry as you used to. The reason being, there is not as much anger within you as there was previously. There is no bullet in the gun.

Many people who rarely get angry are not in denial or are unaware of their circumstances, they simply do not have the inner anger to let out. Anger plays a smaller role in the way they express themselves.

Your practice includes discovering where you hold your own anger, identifying past traumas, and doing the necessary work to heal those traumas through acceptance, forgiveness, compassion, and love–for yourself and others.

This is something you can do starting right now, no matter where you are–no matter your life situation. Nothing outside of yourself, no person, no situation, can prevent you from doing this work. You may begin making progress right now.

Artwork by Cameron Grey, used with permission
This podcast includes music by Azam Ali, Greg Ellis, and Lynne Redmond, used with permission.

Judge Not

January 31, 2016 by kalani

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All this talk of purity and impurity –
These are just opinions. Beyond them are the astonishing energies of creation.
Rays of light from a trillion suns you illumine the alter of your sky.
Rolling blue-green oceans sanctify the air you breathe.
In this moment, you are inhaling their blessing.
Who are you to call any of this pure or impure?
Find the center around which everything revolves– stand here and be flooded with joy.
- The Radiance Sutras

Are we separate, or are we part of the great oneness of the universe?

We stand at the alter of the night sky, Often feeling small, insignificant, and separate from all that is. But isn’t the opposite the truth? Are we not also part of, and connected it to that which the Greeks called the Universe? - the One Song.

Is the flowering plant separate from the ground in which it grows? Uproot any plant and you will have the answer. The seed provides the idea and the earth takes on a new form. What we see, label, and categorize as separate, are in reality, part of the same. The seed asks the earth to express itself as the flower. Everything that grows up from the earth IS the earth in a unique expression of celebration.

“I am not a tree!” You say. “I don’t have roots stuck into the earth. I’m an individual. I’m not dependent on the earth like a flower.” When we believe that we are something separate from the source of our being, we turn towards a path of suffering, of feelings of separateness, of insignificance, and powerlessness.

When we admit to ourselves that we are, in fact, part of the Universe, part of the Earth, and nurtured by the same creative Spirit that sways the oceans and illuminates the night sky, then we turn ourselves towards the path of limitless love, feelings of strength, and connectedness.

Rumi once wrote:

“These forms we seem to be are cups floating in an ocean of living consciousness. They fill in sink without leaving an ark of bubbles or a goodbye spray. What we are, is the ocean, too near to see, though we swim in it and drink it in. Don’t be a cup with the dry rim, or someone who rides all night and never knows the horse beneath his thighs, the surging that carries him along.”

Have you ever paused to observe the divine power of creation that flows with in your own body?

What a miracle it is, the Gift of Life–to be animated, expressive, a self-aware expression of the Earth!

Take time to sit and be still enough to experience the sensation of being. Feel the hum of universal energy inside your body. This energy came from a star, traveling millions of miles, nourishing plants and all the creatures of the oceans and the land. You are blessed with life!

Spend time each day in appreciation and gratitude for this life experience. This is your time. Know that you are a unique expression of the earth, nurtured by the same force that drives a tree to grow and flowers to bloom.

Let go–and allow the One Song to be witnessed through the earthly expression you call your life. Your heart is the heart of the universe.

Jesus said, “Judge not, least ye be judged.” The ego judges while the heart loves. The mind tries to solve puzzles, while the soul dances freely. The body experiences sensations. It is up to you, the Observer, to create your life from the inside out. You are everything you need.

Your practice for today and beyond: See yourself and others as unique expressions of the earth, different notes in the same melody of the One Song.

Life Is Now

January 18, 2016 by kalani

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Immerse yourself in the rapture of music, you know what you love. Go there. Tend to each note, each cord, rising up from silence and dissolving again.

Vibrating strings draw us into this spacious resonance of the heart.

The body becomes light as the sky and you, one with the great musician, who is even now singing us into existence. – Radiance Sutras

This reading, from the radiance sutras, asks us to live in the present moment more deeply by using our senses and allowing ourselves to be enraptured by the continuous stream of input we receive from moment to moment.

As humans, we are conditioned to identify with thoughts. We are predisposed to believing that we can think our world into existence. But with thousands of years of history behind us, many struggle with simple questions, such as, “What is the meaning of life?”

Wisdom suggests that we bring meaning into our lives as a conscious practice, driven by our in-the-moment experiences. Our thoughts and beliefs about the world, however fascinating or perplexing, exist solely within the confines of our own minds. What is real, is waiting to be experienced–and can only be experienced through the senses. Life doesn’t happen in the past. It doesn’t happen later. It happens now.

Life is Now.

We are conditioned from childhood to identify with our minds. Soon after we acquire enough skills for basic communication, we are given problems to solve, riddles to answer, and we receive praise for our performance. We learn to identify our self-worth, in part, by the grades we receive in school and through praise from our and parents and peers. Our ability to solve problems, to identify, remember, and figure things out, becomes not simply a means to achieving quality of life, but a way for each of us to quantify our own value, and the value of others.

When the ego becomes associated with problem-solving, the status and importance of thinking can easily move from that of helper to that of ruler. Instead of using our minds to bring us more satisfaction, we allow ourselves to become slaves to the very questions that were created by our minds–or the minds of others. Does the fact that a question exists mean that there is an answer, or is the question itself flawed?

Consider for a moment, that humans are the only animals that create puzzles to be solved. So highly regarded is the human ability for thinking, that we create books of problems, and even television programs, to prove our mental abilities, to ourselves and each other. We not only seek out problems to solve, we take pride in having solved them. What does this tell us about the need for the mind and ego to consume problems? Does solving problems lead to greater life satisfaction – or is there a simpler way–a more direct path to joy.

Is it rational to presume that we can think our way through problems of the mind? Is it reasonable to assume that we can use the same tool to fix a problem that we used to create it? Could asking a question such as, “What is the meaning of life?” be just another way to feed the mind a puzzle, one that has no absolute answer. Is there any evidence to demonstrate that thinking is a reliable way to enhance your life experience? Does spending great amounts of time thinking about life’s problems often result in joy? Consider those times when you feel most satisfied, joyful, or at peace. Are you thinking or are you experiencing? Are you planning or are you doing?

Spiritual teachers throughout the ages point us not in the direction of contemplation as much as towards our own life experience. Be here now. I am that I am. Attend to this moment. How should we find meaning in our lives? The answer is simple. Pay attention. Pay attention, not to the internal process of thinking, but to your surroundings. Listen to the sounds, Take in the sites, enjoy the smells, tastes, and textures of the universe at play.

People talk about mind and ego. Let’s just drop this whole conversation. Consider instead: There is no mind. There is no ego. There is only incandescent reality at play, beckoning. – Radiance Sutras

Liberating the Soul

September 7, 2013 by kalani

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Splash13 Kalani discusses what causes us to add to our own suffering and provides ways to free us from the bonds of aversion. Based on "The Guest House," a work by spiritual poet, Rumi, this talk is about creating positive relationships with every thoughts and feeling, inviting them into "your home" so that they may fulfill their role in helping us navigate our lives. We each gain knowledge and guidance from these "uninvited guests,' but there's no need to suffer. The KEY is paying attention and compassion.

This podcast features music by Azam Ali, Greg Ellis and Layne Redmond & Tommy Brunjes.

The Nature of Thought

September 6, 2013 by kalani

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Splash14 Kalani talks about the nature of thought as it relates to developing mindfulness and a healthy relationship with one's mind. The design and nature of the brain gives rise to an internal 'storm' of thoughts that are interconnected, dynamic, and have the ability to consume our awareness. Kalani describes ways to remain centered in the present moment, while allowing the mind to fulfill its nature. A healthy relationship with your mind is a KEY to developing a strong Thoughtfulness Practice and an Enlightened life.

This podcast features music by Azam Ali, Greg Ellis and Layne Redmond & Tommy Brunjes.

Seeing as New

August 31, 2013 by kalani

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Splash10 Kalani discusses ways to increase one's sense of joy and contentment by raising his/her awareness and appreciation for his surroundings, attending to the many features and changes in the environment. When we connect with the physical world through all our sense, we root into the present and live life more deeply. This practice is called "Seeing as New," and can help anyone deepen his/her life experience and sense of spiritual connection to the world, to other people, and to his or herself.

This podcast features music by Azam Ali, Greg Ellis and Layne Redmond & Tommy Brunjes.

Spirituality

August 23, 2013 by kalani

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Splash17 Kalani talks about developing a spiritual practice, which is a personal and unique approach to increasing one's own experience of oneness, contentment, and joy. This talk is about finding new ways to approach your spiritual practice while fostering a more inclusive and supportive environment for the diverse range of practices that make up the global spiritual community.

This podcast features music by Azam Ali, Greg Ellis and Layne Redmond & Tommy Brunjes.